The Immaculate Conception

A woman takes her 16 year old daughter to the doctor to get her checked out.

"Ok, Mrs. Smith.  What seems to be the problem.", the doctor asks.

"It's my daughter, Morgan!  We don't know what's wrong with her.  She keeps getting these weird cravings, she's beginning to put on weight and she's been feeling extremely nauseous most mornings.  Please help doctor."

The doctor walks over to Morgan and begins to examine her.  After a few minutes of poking and prodding, the doctor turns to the mother and says, "Mrs. Smith.  Your daughter is about 4 months pregnant."

The mother, astounded says, "Pregnant!  How can that be?  She's never been left alone with a man!  Isn't that right, dear?"

Morgan looks at her mother and responds, "That's right mom!  I've never even kissed a man before!"

Upon hearing this, the doctor walked over to the window and began to stare out.  After about 5 minutes of silence, the mother asks the doctor, "Is something the matter, doctor?"

To which the doctor replied, "No, not really.  But, the last time anything like this happened, a star appeared in the east and three wise men came over the hill.  I'll be damned if I'm going to miss it this time!"

Auburn Takes on Oregon

Contribution by Prince Raymond

If you love college football than you are probably looking forward to the Tostitos BCS National Championship Game that is coming up in a few weeks. The Auburn Tigers are taking on the Oregon ducks and it should turn out to be an offensive showcase. Both of these teams have some of the highest scoring offenses in all of college football. They also both have some of the most dynamic athletes. Cam Newton is the Heisman Trophy winner and promises to always put a show and put up points on the board. LaMichael James for Oregon is also the top running back in the country and should prove a tough test for Auburn's defense.

I got my tickets to go to this game weeks ago and decided to take my friend George. We both said goodbye to our wives, switched on our home alarm systems from ALL HOME SECURITY, packed out bags and boarded the plane for sunny Glendale Arizona got the national championship. The game should be really exciting because it is the premiere game of the college football season. All of the hype and trash talk leads up to this point. This game will decide the best team in college football and George and I will be there to see who wins it!

Glendale Arizona should be a perfect place to host a national championship because the weather should be perfect and the city of Glendale has something to offer almost anyone.

Final Fantasy: Type 0 in the Works?

Hey there.  When G4 announced that the name and logo for Final Fantasy: Type 0 was trademarked, it immediately grabbed my attention.  Square Enix might be releasing a new Final Fantasy game!  It may be a spin off... it may be a continuation of an existing Final Fantasy title.  As of right now, it's way to early to tell.  G4 doesn't have info on the project but they're willing to spill what ever they do have.  Check out the brief announcement here.

Intrigued?  Yes.  Excited?  Not so much.  Not until we receive some more details.  For all we know, this is Square Enix trademarking POTENTIAL names.  And even if they are, I would assume that because they are trademarking anything Final Fantasy, some sort of product will become of it.  Until then, later!

Always Be In The Know With ESPN

Guest post written by my buddy Lavern Small

Almost everyday I manage to catch ESPN on my expert Satellite tv. Even though I'm a woman I do love my sports. ESPN provides me up-to-date segments on all the teams I love. The commentators are very personable and often very funny. There is a bit of analysis on different teams and also several opinions on many subjects as well. There is also the very helpful ticker on the bottom that will display the scores and highlights from the night before.

ESPN is great because they have fun with sports. It's not always a serious subject. For example, my favorite show is Pardon The Interruption of P.T.I. which airs in the late afternoon and early evening between segments of Sports Center. Mike Wilbon and Tony Kornheiser are perhaps some of the funniest sports commentators I have ever come across but yet they still provide the material that the people are interested in.

What I also enjoy about ESPN is not only it's sports analysis and breakdowns. They also broadcast wonderful programs that a truly enjoyable. These programs can showcase athletes giving back to their community, granting a child a wish, or even a program about the adversaries that an athletes has had to overcome to be where he is. This network allows people to see athletes as more than just a sports figure. It makes them human and we as an audience can connect deeper to the people who deliver our favorite sports.

Going Back to Blogging Roots

Hey there.  I've been reading some of my old posts and I've just realized that I've gone a bit much on the commercial side.  Don't get me wrong, I think it's great that I've been considered for sponsored posts as well as guest posts.  It allows me to add a new dimension to my site.  However, as I've gone through the past month or so, I've noticed that original content is less and less while 3rd party posts have increased.  The solution?  Increase the amount of original Metallman content.  Adding more of the essence that is me should bring the my identity back into my site.

I've gone away from the daily BS that saturates my life and have gone the way that many bloggers have gone.  They simply let their blogs/site fall into obscurity and do not update their site with their original work.  They simply become another site with the same stuff that is already on the internet.  There is nothing to make someone want to come check out your site when there are thousands of others with a similar post.  I admit, I falling down that path.  No more, my friends.

I've decided that I need to add myself back into this site.  My daily ramblings, my daily quirks, and my daily actions that bring smiles to those around me.  I feel that many things have gone on that were definitely blog worthy have been lost to laziness and a lack of dedication.  And the one that loses out on those experiences are you, my readers, and I apologize.  2011 will be a banner year for Metallman.com and I'm hoping that you guys will stick along for the ride.  Thanks.

Motivational Monday - Hope

One day... one day...